flynhghr posted a comment on Friday 20th November 2009 6:11am for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Poor Luna, always thinking she's on the worse end of stuff. I'd like to see her make it through one day of Harry's last week without passing out/vomiting. You're rapidly progressing Harry, and Luna's not staying caught up, which is causing some very interesting stuff. Is the fact that Harry is a killer going to bother her? What a contrast, from man-eating killer to piggy back ride giver. I'm sad that this ends Harry/Karina, because after his week he needs a good ol couch romp for sure.

Tracey1 posted a comment on Sunday 8th November 2009 3:19pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

I absolutely loved your nod to the wonderful Cloris Leachman and the best movie role ever!! I'm off to finish reading this rather interesting fic and will review fully at the end.

fyrecat posted a comment on Friday 26th December 2008 9:16am for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Another great chapter!
It looks like the Karina situation is neatly tied up. The letters from Luna are very believable. - did you get a female friend to write these for you?

I missed the rest of the cursebreaking crew this chapter and last. I'm looking forward to their return.

It's good to see that Frau Blucher found a new job.

Keep up the great work! and Thanks again.

Editorial notes:

"You’ve didn’t feel that..."
- You didn't...

"...you retrieve your back of galleons."
- bag of galleons

"You sit next in a comfortable chair next to her bed."
- delete the first 'next'.

"...resist the corruption goes with this new life."
- corruption that goes with...

TxA_GunFighter posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 3:27am for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Good chapter, Luna just needs a good snog.

gunny

JBern replied:

She certainly does.~Jim

Rebel Goddess posted a comment on Thursday 8th March 2007 7:32am for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

I didn't think this story could go higher in my estimation, but the subtle Princess Bride reference managed to do it. You really, really like throwing in Naked Veela whenever you feel things are getting a little too dark, don't you? At least Harry should be pleased by Fleur considering him larger than average. Most puppies not being afraid of Charlie was a very funny idea. I had this vision of him trying to glare at a load of labrador puppies and them just fawning over him. Poor Mr Lovegood!

JBern replied:

Dontcha just love the Princess Bride.   In the sequel, I'm tempted to have Harry showdown with Voldy start with "Hello, my name is Harry Potter.   Fifteen years ago, you killed my father.   Prepare to die."~Jim

Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Friday 2nd March 2007 2:10am for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Excellent running battle in the mansion. Fascinating predator concepts.

Luna and Harry fighting makes me sad. I see why you're doing it. Excellent set up for making them eventually closer and helping themselves through issues - I HOPE!

Sort of like Empire Strikes Back - sort of a win but a lot of sad situations yet to resolve.

Great Fic!

JBern replied:

Thanks for the comparisons to ESB.   The battle was probably the best I could do.   Sometimes I go back to it and look at it and it feels like something is missing...

Jim

Musings of Apathy posted a comment on Saturday 6th January 2007 7:42pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Excellent chapter and excellent story. Your take on the characters is very original. I especially like how you are using Bill in this story.

Harry is finding that a love life is not as simple as our hormones would lead us to believe. I look forward to how you will approach Laura and her request. With that you will have to ask yourself what response would be in character, and if both are, which can you best work through in Harry's logical thought process.

I do, though, look forward most to returning to the events of the first chapter, which you have promised shortly, thanks.

Thank you for writing and sharing.

Mike (MoA)

JBern replied:

The new chapter will be out midweek.    It's actually done, but I am trying to pace myself and get a jump on my next chapters.   Hopefully, you've found this an interesting take on being inside the mind of Harry.~Jim

Jim_xinu posted a comment on Saturday 30th December 2006 8:23am for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Here's a few beta-ish things I found:

"You’ve didn’t feel that when you used Crucio..."

You’ve didn’t -> You didn't

"You send you’re cutter..."

you're -> your

"...open is now in it’s correct position."

it's -> its

"Two options grab a weapon..."

Add comma between options and grab.

"No wait!"

Add comma between no and wait.

"...you retrieve your back of galleons."

back -> bag

"...and to resist the corruption goes with this new life."

Add with between corruption & goes.

Good fight scene. Knowing you, now that he's had a few successes, I bet he's going to find out hard that the 'kitty' can't solve all problems--or even just the violent ones.

Geez, he as good as told her who he is? Stupid kitty cook! :-)

I find it rather surprising that the Ministry would go to that much trouble to try to reign in the Quibbler. Must be Umbridge, personally.

Good chapter, thanks for sharing it with us.

JBern replied:

Thank you for the corrections.   I'll fix them when I do my next round of housekeeping.   I really appreciate it.   The next chapter will be out midweek.   ~Jim

ThunderGod posted a comment on Friday 29th December 2006 7:06pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

woohoo..I get back from my brothers..and have found things to read..including this..had to read it even if all that long distance travelling has given me a headache..

great chapter

ThunderGod

JBern replied:

Thanks!   Glad you enjoyed it.~Jim

Patches posted a comment on Tuesday 26th December 2006 11:21pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Thanks for writing. I know the holidays can be really hectic. I like this chapter. A little gory but, Hey! Harry is a Jaguar! They are the real King of the jungle! I glad Harry got Karina's life straightened out. It would be great if Chico's grandfather accepts him. It is really too bad Luna's dad is getting the bad deal. Hopefully Harry can help her and their friendship won't suffer from all this stress.
Again, thanks for writing. I look forward to your next update. pms

JBern replied:

Thanks for the review.   Like I said when I first introduced it, Harry's animagus form is here to stay.   It isn't just some 'oh lets make him an animagus' like a checklist.   Next chapter will be out midweek.~Jim

MarinePotterfan posted a comment on Monday 25th December 2006 4:33pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Another Great chapter, It would be nice if Harry is able to help Luna in someway. Update soon.

MPF

JBern replied:

Thanks.   It would be nice if Harry could help Luna.   Though you have to remember help is a four letter word.   Hope you are having a great holiday season.~Jim

Jason9 posted a comment on Monday 25th December 2006 4:30pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Just got up to date on the story, and reviewed for a couple of other stories. I'm really beginning to get into the 2nd person writing, and I hope you find the experience to be a meaningful one. On a side note, some dialogue is incredibly difficult to follow in this perspective, but I can deffinately appreciate the effort in doing something unique like this. I'm really loving the in depth ward and curse breaking, something that most stories completly ignore, gloss over, or explain with gigantic logic holes. I also think your characterization of Harry, and espicially Bill are spot on, picking up all the big positives and negatives. The only thing that I would like to caution you about is that many authors forget that their characters are supposed to be human, and as such, will mess up and end up on the losing end occasionaly. As much as I love Jeconais' writing, as he pulls off super!Harry very well, I'm sick of perfect!Harry. Sorry, that last bit is just a bit of a pet peeve with me. So to summarize my long winded review, Love the story, doing a great job.

JBern replied:

Wow!   A speed reader!   2nd person does take a bit of getting used to, but I think it can be even more immersive than 1st person - really allowing the reader to get into Harry's mind.   I've never seen a story that went that far into Curse Breaking and Ward Crafting, so I decided to do one as well as try a radical approach to Animagery.   I'll look at the dialogue and see where there can be some improvements.

My version of Harry will always make mistakes.   Mistakes like getting involved with a single mother, winding up in a situation where he has to fight his way out of a trap.   Further pissing off a young and insecure Ravenclaw.   I won't even go into the mistakes my other story has that Harry making.   Glad you like the characterization of Bill and Harry in this one.~Jim

Magnificent the Destroyer Lord posted a comment on Monday 25th December 2006 4:04pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

There's a Young Frankenstein reference? (too lazy/busy to find it... *sighs* Is it in reference to the corpses or to the rather interesting bedscenes?

Thanks and good luck with the next chapter

M*T*D*L*

P.s. Is there a way to put up fiction on this website?

JBern replied:

Frau Blucher was one of the characters in Young Frankenstein.   Though I should have had Fleur ask Harry if he wanted a 'roll in zey hay'....

As for posting on this site, refer to the FAQs.   Tim explains it all there.   It's his sandbox, I just kept to play in the sand.

Jim

Mark Blaine posted a comment on Monday 25th December 2006 2:34pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Good work.

JBern replied:

Thanks.   Hope you had a Merry Xmas.~Jim

Paul Dueck posted a comment on Monday 25th December 2006 5:07am for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Good Chapter, and Merry Christmas.

PD

JBern replied:

Thanks. I hope you are having a Merry Xmas as well!   Jim

MrRobertsIII posted a comment on Sunday 24th December 2006 10:23pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Good chapter! Will review later when fully awake.

JBern replied:

Thanks.   I look forward to it.   Merry Xmas -Jim

dboris posted a comment on Sunday 24th December 2006 7:45pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

Awwww I'm checking every hour for new chapters and I'm usually all the time checking all the time in DLP.net for new chapters. It seems I missed your post =(

Well, it's a good chapter.

Thank you for the wonderful morning I have thanks to you.

Merry Christmas.

JBern replied:

Thank you for your compliments.   I hope the rest of your Xmas is just as good.~Jim

Manatheron posted a comment on Sunday 24th December 2006 6:01pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

:o

Uh oh, I get a feeling that this is probably going to be exactly the wrong thing to say.

JBern replied:

You seem to be right on track with what is coming next chapter.   Fasten the safety belts.   Harry's relationship with Luna is in for a bumpy ride.   Merry Xmas - Jim

Crys posted a comment on Sunday 24th December 2006 1:22pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

> polished marble floors and about one hundred kilos of accelerating feline are not a good combination
*laugh* Why did a scene from a cartoon suddenly spring to mind? :)

> Frau leaves to summon the PdM and probably check on some human spleen muffins she has baking
Harry, you need to bring your brain back to Earth. Though you've had a REALLY rough day to this point, so I suppose I can't get too upset with your PoV.

> You do realize there is a chance that incidents like tonight may somehow find there way into my speech?"
You realize that that will merely put all the Weasleys into brain-lock . . .

> Is it tempting fate to wonder how much worse it will get?
YES

Fun story, Jim. One great big thread tied off. Luna's life getting flushed by the MoM thread just starting.

JBern replied:

Glad you liked it!   I figured Harry wouldn't quite know what to do with marble floors.   I seem to remember seeing a little weiner mutt spin out on a floor it was running on and smack into the kitchen cabinets.   It was the inspiration for my scene.

I'm sure Human Spleen muffins are full of protien.

Provided they make it that far, Harry's best man speech should be entertaining.~Jim

stgilman10 posted a comment on Sunday 24th December 2006 12:49pm for I'm a Snake When We Disagree

When you mentioned Frau Blucher, you should have had some off-screen magical animal make its signature noise.

JBern replied:

It was tempting to mention the griffons screaming at the sound of her name.   Many think Blazing Saddles is Brooks' best movie.   I still love Young Frankenstein.~Jim