Jim_xinu posted a comment on Friday 11th January 2008 5:24pm for Bartering the Truth

Quick work disposing of Barty Jr. I was surprised. Since to see HJ could handle it, too.

You really don't like house elves, do you? :-) I don't think I ever seen anyone kill off Winky before.

The bartered truth was a very interesting exercise in realpolitik. An interesting departure from the more typically (over) used memory charms to shaping the 'truth'.

Also very surprising to see Skeeter caught so soon. I presume it means good things for the future--new things happening with less rehash of canon events.

Interesting idea about DD maybe having helped make the Map. Which, of course, raises the idea he may notice HJ's name issue.

Great scene with Sirius. Perfect balance of length, brevity, detail, hurry. Excellent.

Good chapter, thanks for sharing it with us.

JBern replied:

You should know that by now I like to shake things up.   Now that I am straying from canon, I won't be back.

I thought someone should finally have a story where Harry has to fight a derranged house elf.   All these people were the "good" guys.   Why should we sink to "memory charms" when there is lots of bartering to do.   Everyone wants something right?

Next chapter in 2-3 weeks.~Jim

AmonRA posted a comment on Friday 11th January 2008 3:28pm for Bartering the Truth

Wow! This story is so good! Very original and moves along at a nice pace.

JBern replied:

Thanks.   Next chapter in 2-3 weeks.~Jim

Aelita posted a comment on Friday 11th January 2008 8:39am for Bartering the Truth

Please update soon! I love this story!

JBern replied:

2-3 weeks~Jim

DobbyElfLord posted a comment on Friday 11th January 2008 7:06am for Bartering the Truth

Hi Jim,

Great chapter as usual. I was surprised Crouch Jr. was taken out so quickly. Now what DE can Dumbles get to be the DADA prof?

Did you not like Sarah Underhill in my story? Imean, kill her off, fine. But to have her raped by Snape and pregnent with his kid is just cruel! ;-)

I am looking forward to the broom race and seeing how "Ambassador" Potter pursues his international relations. (Since he made such a brilliant start to it already.)

Rick

JBern replied:

I keep forgetting to mention in my author notes where I got the inspiration for Sarah Underhill.   Damn!   Still I bet you didn't see her as being the reason Sirius sent Snape to get killed by Remus.

I thought your version of Sarah was good, but I didn't like her "fate" of dying off screen like that.~Jim

Quizer posted a comment on Friday 11th January 2008 5:13am for Bartering the Truth

Wow, what an eventful chapter this time. Good that fake!Moody has been taken care of, although the loss of the map is inconvenient. Did you take it away because it's too powerful a tool for an enlightened Harry to have for your purposes? Or will he be reasonably quick in assembling a substitute? ("We have the technology... We can rebuild it, bigger and better than ever before!" *cue evil laughter*)

Loved the talk with Sirius. At least one reasonably sane person who Harry can show his cards to. The 'gender confused' joke was great. Looking forward to more of this kind of interaction.

The sections where Harry talks to Hermione, to Katie, and to Alicia and Angelina were all enjoyable. I still think the whole Censure bit may have been a bit extreme, but I guess it's the logical conclusion if you take the canon reaction and add the whole censure concept to it.


Looking forward to the next chapters!


Quizer

JBern replied:

As always thanks for the long and thoughtful review.   I just couldn't see Dumbledore letting the Map get away like that.   HJ can probably craft a new and improved one, provided that he isn't too busy with other things...

I'd been looking forward to using the "gender confused" joke ever since I started looking at how Sirius would fit into the story.  My version of HJ can still hold grudges, he's just more selective about it.~Jim

crazyP posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 6:56pm for Bartering the Truth

Great chapter !!
Please update soon!!
I'm so glad Harry told Sirius everything

JBern replied:

Glad you enjoyed it.   Next chapter in 2-3 weeks.~Jim

jeffstrauser@yahoo.com posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 6:44pm for Bartering the Truth

Outstanding chapter!!!! Whatever you do don't listen to Motograter and read fanfiction, never seems to work out right! Anyways I loved the chapter, can the contestants cast spells during the broom race? If so the vomitting hex would work great for a distraction!!!! What are all of the tasks anyways? I like your tasks whatever they all are way better then the ones in the books, I mean task 2 and Task 3 were both let downs oh well. Do keep up the outstanding work and update soon please!!!!:):):):)

JBern replied:

Some of the tasks are mentioned on the forum under this site.   No spell casting during the broom race.~Jim

Superninjamonkey posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 4:29pm for Bartering the Truth

Excellent, I love the concept of this story.

JBern replied:

Thanks.~Jim

PerfesserN posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 1:34pm for Bartering the Truth

Nice fight scene, in a real fight both combatants get the crap kicked out of them. The winner is the one who can limp away when its over.
Good job having Sirius in on the secret as well, he gets to be the cavalry later on.
Will the twins recover from their rectal-cranial inversion anytime soon?
Inquiring minds want to know. . .
N!

JBern replied:

Wouldn't you rather see it where the twins push HJ into retaliation?   Thanks for the compliments.~Jim

CosmosGravitation posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 8:44am for Bartering the Truth

One of the best chapters yet. I don't know what it is about this story but it has captured my imagination. All the scenes were strong, especially the fight and the Sirius black parting.

Poor Hermione, I doubt she knew how to react in that closet with Harry. A few chapters ago wasn't she acting kind of cold to Harry? I guess the censure and attempt on Harry's life changed that. Hermione probably hasn't had much attention from members of the opposite gender at this point in the story. When I read the first five canon books I was always sort of rooting for Harry/Hermione, at least more then Harry/Ginny. I can't help but think that the only reason Hermione went for Ron in canon is because Harry never showed the slightest bit of interest in her. I'd suggest you write a Harry/Hermione, but I recall for the last review of Turn Me Loose I suggested a Harry/Tonks pairing story and I don't want to seem like a pairing obsessed fan.

More details in the story would be nice. For example, I remember at one point during the politiking somebody brought up Sirius Black but you didn't actually say who first mentioned him. Just "somebody", and then Harry responded. Perhaps you have your reasons, but I think whoever first mentioned him would be something that Harry would notice and it would also help us readers to receive a better mental image of the scene and discussion.

The Julius Caesar line was a good one. If Sirius Black is Julius Caesar does that make Harry Octavian?

I'm stumped as to who the new defence teacher could be. If you bring back Lupin to teach that would surely create some conflict, but that seems a little to cliche for you. Besides, Lupin is still a Werewolf. Every other significant possibility I can think of either wears the mark or is tied up elsewhere. Original character maybe?

JBern replied:

I'm still deciding who I want to be the replacement DADA, but it will likely be either a Beauxbaton or Durmstrang instructor willing to test themselves against the dreaded curse.   Perhaps Igor Karkaroff himself might be interested...

I don't mind pairing suggestions.   I have a H/Hr bunny waiting for me to clear away other projects.

If Sirius is Caesar, Harry is Marc Anthony.

Lupin will eventually be by, mostly because you readers deserve to see the train wreck play out.

Next chapter in 2-3 weeks.~Jim

 

Dellaran posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 5:47am for Bartering the Truth

Every time I read one of your updates, I come away shaking my head, amazed at how inventive you are. This story, and Bungle/Turn Me Loose, have become two of my favorites. Thank you!

JBern replied:

Thank you for the compliments.   Next chapter in 2-3 weeks.~Jim

Fenris Ulf posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 1:40am for Bartering the Truth

Hehe the Hat is so awesome I love his attitude. I can't wait for more of this story. Sirius was confused about how to deal with Harry in canon this should screw him up nicely :)


Rob

JBern replied:

Sirius will feel that in some way he does have James back.   HJ will probably have to remind him several times that he's a different person.~Jim

MrRobertsIII posted a comment on Thursday 10th January 2008 1:38am for Bartering the Truth

Wow. Did not expect you to expose the fake Moody and Skeeter so soon. Great fight scene. I liked how you gave house-elves a limit. Too many fics make them close to all powerful.

The best part was the bartering. Fudge's line had me laughing. I could just see Skeeter squirming.

Love your OCs. Don't know if I like Hack or the Hat better.

JBern replied:

Maybe I should cross my two fics over and have the Hat and Hack team up?

Glad I can still pull a rabbit out of my ... Hat, (sorry pun intended) and surprise you readers.~Jim

Cromi posted a comment on Wednesday 9th January 2008 11:07pm for Bartering the Truth

Another great chapter. I must've read the last one ten times and I like where this one is going.

Keep up the good work!

JBern replied:

Thanks.   Next chapter in 2-3 weeks.~Jim

dic posted a comment on Wednesday 9th January 2008 9:20pm for Bartering the Truth

Yay! nice chapter...
would have expected dobby to come rushing to hj's defenses when winky attacked him... but who knows how house-elves work? anyway... liked it, keep it up!!

JBern replied:

Good question who knows how House Elves work?   It would stink for Dobby to show up whenever HJ is in danger wouldn't it?~Jim

Kyle_Dodge1 posted a comment on Wednesday 9th January 2008 6:28pm for Bartering the Truth

Keep it up, J.

JBern replied:

Thanks.   Next chapter in 2-3 weeks.~Jim

FULLMETAL posted a comment on Wednesday 9th January 2008 6:04pm for Bartering the Truth

Great chapter, through and through! The dirty politics made it for me and Harry's little talk with Sirius was a great way to end the chapter. This also marks the point where the story truly goes AU (now that crouch Jr. is out of the picture), and I cant' wait to see where it goes. Looking forward to the next one!
Oh! And Harry's description of Hermione, as well as his reasons why he wouldn't date her, was brilliant. I look forward to the day when you decide to put up a Harry/Hermione story, the 'ship will never be the same again :)

JBern replied:

I've got a H/Hr bunny lying around, but it'll be awhile.   Before it shows up there will likely be a Harry/Lavender story showing up.   If I ever write it, it'll definitely be "different."

Glad you liked this.   Next chapter in 2-3 weeks.~Jim

joeBob posted a comment on Wednesday 9th January 2008 5:52pm for Bartering the Truth

PS. You didn't make it clear if Winky was dead (seems likely she would be).

Was she toast or will she be the first marked house-elf in Voldemort's ranks?

Drunk and harassing HJ could be fun. ;-)

JBern replied:

She's dead.   Plus she didn't pick up the drinking habit until she was freed by Barty Sr.~Jim

Killedbykarma posted a comment on Wednesday 9th January 2008 5:50pm for Bartering the Truth

Whoa. This is amazing. I've never read something quite like this.

JBern replied:

Glad you liked it.~Jim

joeBob posted a comment on Wednesday 9th January 2008 5:49pm for Bartering the Truth

Fine chapter. HJ may have not been maximally prudent with the way he confronted Fake-Moody but the fight and the result sure made up for that!

Excellent black-politics scene. I always thought that Fudge couldn't operate on that level though. That Umbitch, Malfoy, and others had to do significant coaching behind the scenes.

How can the hat not know if Dumbledore is AC or DC? It was on his deviant, eleven-year-old head. It has seen any guests and recreational habits Dumby has.
If nothing else, all those "Out Magazine"s scattered in Dumby's chambers should be a clue.

Peter liked the Bee Gees? (P-tooey) He truly WAS evil!

JBern replied:

You know you like the Bee Gees...

Glad you liked the chapter.   Still the Hat didn't see AD until he was well passed his sexual prime, so there are only rumors to go off of.

I know Fudge is supposed to be a buffoon, but I can't bring myself to write a character that reaches the top and is that much of an idiot.   I prefer the guy from the beginning of book 3 who brushes off the whole Aunt Marge thing to the guy who he immediately ordered kissed by the Dementors.~Jim