Turn Me Loose: A Harry Potter Adventure
And I'm Here to Please
By JBern
Reviews
Matthew Sands posted a comment on Monday 19th May 2008 9:27am for And I'm Here to Please
Full points for not having Dumbledore simply exist as a doormat for Indy/
Superpowered Harry.
Extra Credit for continuing your trend of exploring different aspects and paths of characters in your assorted stories.
And, oh my, it looks like you blew the lid off the curve with the adventures of wrong-hole and dick-hurts.
For a serious though, if we're still following the default timeline, both Snape and Dumbledore know that he's going to die within the year. Which means he needs to shape Harry to move in the right direction before he goes. Pissing him off enough to get himself killed if Harry is still in fact a Horcrux(or if Dumbledore mistakenly believes that he is for that matter) is therefore a worthwhile goal.
However, this time around I don't think we're going to see Harry naming a kid after the two of them regardless of how it plays out.
JBern replied:
You seem to be on to something here Matthew. I can't say that you're a hundred percent right, but there's something to your theory...
Depends, if Harry has enough kids, he might run out of names and be forced to use one of them...
Regards,
Jim
Donald McLeod posted a comment on Monday 19th May 2008 8:10am for And I'm Here to Please
Oh Wow!! First Hagred now ' "What’s a little borderline Necromancy among friends?" ' This jest to good for words.
Thank you
JBern replied:
Thanks. Glad you enjoyed the chapter. More coming soon.~Jim
TxA_GunFighter posted a comment on Monday 19th May 2008 4:08am for And I'm Here to Please
Good chapter.
gunny
JBern replied:
Thanks.~Jim
Meteoricshipyards posted a comment on Monday 19th May 2008 2:36am for And I'm Here to Please
Welcome back! Nice chapter.
Not sure what Dumbledore was trying to say to Harry except that Harry was still under Dumbledore's control.
The beach was interesting; Not sure if the Room of Requirement is that powerful, but then again, JKR never said it wasn't so....
Thanks for the update. Looking forward to more of your work.
Tom A.
JBern replied:
Well, the RoR created a tunnel to Hogsmeade in book 7. I don't see how making a little beach is to out of bounds. One of the points I am trying to make is that if people knew about that Room after book 5, there'd likely be someone using it 24/7.
Harry thinks he knows what AD is up to, but can anyone ever be certain?
Thanks as always for the reviews. I really need to catch up on your work as well.
Regards~Jim
Crys posted a comment on Monday 19th May 2008 1:33am for And I'm Here to Please
> Hack raises his head and stares at Hagrid. "She scream ‘Hawg t’rid.’ It troll speak. Means ‘wrong hole’."
This conversation is wrong on so many levels. Funny as hell, but wrong.
AD is a right bastard. If Harry throws a snit, he's proving his own immaturity (and AD can treat him as a child). If Harry doesn't, AD's gotten away with the enforced transfiguration without penalty. Now just have to be creative in the punishment. He's too powerful for a tit-for-tat (into Fawkes's stand perhaps). OTOH, what he did proved his "everything must go my way" attitude. Too bad he'll never acknowledge his hypocrisy.
*frown* Susan should've known better. But with Hannah and her own recent loss, she's a good choice to voice that complaint.
Now, with a blood bag, you realize that you HAVE to have Hermione carry it around? Charging of the wards and all. *innocent smile*
JBern replied:
Finally catching up on replies! Sorry about the whole "Wrong Hole" thing. I like to push the limits of decency every now and then, sometimes I even exceed them. :-)
Glad you like AD as a bastard. I liked the irony of using Susan to illustrate the unrealistic expectations others have of Harry especially given how I used her in TFtCD.
Poor Hermione...
More coming soon. Thanks as always.~Jim
Patches posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 11:23pm for And I'm Here to Please
I like this chapter. Harry has a spirited talk with Snape. That didn't go well. Has to rescue Hack. That wasn't enjoyable. Then he has an enjoyable time with Luna after insulting Ginny and gets turned into a footstool by Dumbledore! That was unexpected. Looks like more "fun" is coming. I look forward to more of this storyl. Thanks so much for writing. pms
JBern replied:
Glad you like it.More is coming soon. Lie 13 is almost done and I plan to be back to this one shortly.~Jim
carlelonex posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 7:17pm for And I'm Here to Please
Still going strong, hopeing for an update soon
JBern replied:
More coming soon. Probably by June 15th.~Jim
joeBob posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 6:08pm for And I'm Here to Please
Thanks for the update.
JBern replied:
You're most welcome. Thanks for the review.~Jim
stuart posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 3:32pm for And I'm Here to Please
Been awhile since I read this one!! Nice filler looking forward to some action and Necromancy!! I did notice in the conversation with Katie you wrote 'draw' instead of 'jaw'. To bad about your other story getting cut, I'm sure its just a matter of time before one or most likely all are picked up. Cheers
JBern replied:
Yeah, I have to go fix that error. Thanks for reminding me. Lie 13 is almost done and I expect to be back to this one shortly.~Jim
Meghan posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 2:05pm for And I'm Here to Please
Fantastic finish. I do love your way with words. Until the next chapter then.
JBern replied:
Glad you liked it. I look forward to your strong finish as well.~Jim
The Midnight Poster posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 1:44pm for And I'm Here to Please
It's great to see another chapter! I did want to read that Harry punched Dumbledore's lights out when he reverted back I'll wait and see what happens next chapter.
JBern replied:
Well the best revenge Harry can get is removing himself from AD's control. More coming soon.~Jim
rune1806 posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 12:51pm for And I'm Here to Please
Love the footrest joke well done, and that was some very good Luna in the talk with Albus. The part with Sue is so true the police need to stop crime but I do not have time to help. I have a fire in the stove come put it out, the kids need a coach you do it I do not have the time. Apathy is a hot button for me sorry for the rant. Great update thanks for writing.
JBern replied:
Seems I hit a nerve in this chapter for you. Glad you liked it. More coming soon. Lie 13 is just about done.
Regards,
Jim
Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 12:43pm for And I'm Here to Please
*snicker* I love that last line. It seems like life is moving about normal for Harry (at least, *his* version of normal). I dn'tt hink Dumbles hasn't quite realized just the depth of anger involved nor how culpable he really is in mucking things up, else he'd not have pulled that stunt (if he had to do that, he should at least washed his feet and worn clean socks).
It's going to get real interesting if Harry manages that homunculus and is able to move around more. I reckon that much freedom would give Dumbles severe palpitations of the control impulse.
JBern replied:
I'm looking forward to writing the next chapter. The old saying about this here place isn't big enough for the two of us may very well apply in Harry and AD's case.
Thanks for the review. More coming soon.~Jim
Ltank687 posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 12:12pm for And I'm Here to Please
nice, like the progression. Harry as a footstool is probably the funniest thing I've seen, and dear Luna just keeps growing fonder in my eyes.
But I'm extremely excited for your next chapters of the Lie Ive Lived and cannot wait for that. This story is great, but your other is fantastic and I look forward to reading more!
JBern replied:
Lie 13 will be done soon. I think you'll be pleased.~Jim
Wonderbee31 posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 11:27am for And I'm Here to Please
First off, Dumbledore...he needs some spanking, hard and he needs it soon. Really do wish someone would knock himm off his oh so high and righteous perch and down with the regular folks for a while. Sweet moment with Hargrid and Hack, but will probably end up bleaching my brain becasue of that, LOL. Sweet moment with Luna, who you continue to catch nicely, and Hermione, who you actually catch well to, as she just seems to be unable to control her mouth, which is maybe why she and Ron actually did get on for a bit, until the two mouths got in the way. Sweet part there with Snape, and love that little dig about him being so brave, (what was JKR smoking, and how much does it go for an ounce), and can't wait to see what goes down next time.
JBern replied:
Harry's best revenge is to get himself out from under AD's thumb. Glad you *liked* the Hack and Hagrid scene.
I couldn't resist the dig at Snape - "He was the bravest man I've ever known". Ever notice how much book 7 was about Dumbledore and Snape and how little it was really about Harry? Just some food for thought.
More coming soon. Lie 13 is almost done.~Jim
Bogdan posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 11:24am for And I'm Here to Please
Half a day I've been digesting this in my head, and I can state that the 'Dumbledore showing his colors at last' plot doesn't sit right by me.
I do not think that what Dumbledore did was not reason and planning. He wants to piss off Harry into doing something. If I am wrong about this I'll eat my boxers. The 'public' conflict at Azkaban last chapter was the first clue, this chapter made it obvious. Last evening Harry told Snape that his worst fear is to be a pawn for Dumbledore (and Voldemort), the next day Dumbledore transfigures him into an object he can step on with stinky feet anyway he wants.
Most Manipulative!Dumbledore want control over Harry (as in Harry becoming "Dumbledore’s man through and through"), yours wants control over the metaphorical chess board. I am of the opinion that Harry was wrong that "Dumbledore’s greatest fear is Riddle wins or I win and turn dark". I think that Dumbledore’s worst fear is to fail to win this war on HIS terms. The Dumbledore you portray wouldn’t care for a Harry that comes back to him with pleas for help, advice and support, as he is smart enough to realize it is far too late for this for both of them. Your Dumbledore has chosen Anger as his tool in controlling Harry. He pushed Harry away from the black market dealer, and now that I think about it, the support of a metamorph and his possible in with the werewolves. His former friends Hermione and Ginny — afraid of him. Ron — Harry will never again place trust in him. The inventive twins — most likely afraid of his revenge.
Dumbledore is backing Harry into a corner just as Palpatine backed Anakin into a corner, until there was nothing more to see trough the red tunnel vision caused by focusing one’s anger but what the Master Manipulator shows you. Until you destroy the very things you fight for with your own hands.
I think the first one to play with the "Dumbledore played with Snape’s Dark Mark and layered his own compulsions above Riddle’s until Snape barely has any free will of his own" plot device was Loralee. If you add in your concept of Life Debts, I can actually feel for Snape. Of all the separate three directions he is pulled, he at least shows the token resistance of trying to do the right thing, and then Harry goes and hexes him in front the whole class. One could ask: why should he bother after this?
I am also tempted to expect something similar in regards to Fawkes, like in The Sin of Existance’s ‘Cold as Ice’ ("It's a shame, what Dumbledore did to the creature. It's hardly a phoenix anymore, more just a personal yes-bird for Dumbledore."), but I think that anything you plan for Fawkes is likely to top that.
But back to my opening statement. Dumbledore came up with the "turn Harry into a foot-rest" offensive too soon for Snape not to have showed (one way or the other) his conversation with Harry to the Headmaster.
Considering that Dumbledore had more than a year of complete access to the Black library, had been cooking the "reinforce the Hogwarts wards with Harry Potter’s blood" since before the summer (me thinks WELL BEFORE the summer, more like since Harry fried Quirrelmort with his touch alone) and has had to have done some major research into discovering possible flaws, to believe that this "homunculus" loophole is genuine and that Dumbledore didn’t
a) anticipate it and planned for it;
b) tamper with the book, creating a way for him to take COMPLETE control over Harry;
c) both of the above;
would be foolish. He already has magical devices set up that operate on Harry’s blood magic in his office. This is merely the next step forward. And, as Musings of Apathy said in his review, Dumbledore is outright stating that his office would be empty for the night.
To me, this smells like a setup. Dumbledore wants Harry to be angry and desperate enough to take his bait and prideful and desperate enough not to take the "I am Ambassador Potter now, how dare transfigure me into a foot stool and place your dirty feet on me" diplomatic and public approach. And it seems to get what he wants.
Now, the question is: "AM I RIGHT?".
JBern replied:
Thank you again for the long review. Sorry I have been delinquent in my response. About Anger, you are mostly correct. AD is a master button pusher and Harry is no exception.
Still, this version of AD is capable of oversight. McGonagall paid with her life because of it. So, he is capable of misteps and not all-seeing, all-knowing. It may be a case that he knows that challenging Harry is the best way to bring out Harry's own greatness - tough love at it's best. It may be that AD is dying and has to push vice guide Harry in the direction AD thinks he should go. There are numerous possibilities.
So, in conclusion, you are somewhat right, but not completely right. Although for leaving such a long review, you are definitely alright by me!
Regards,
Jim
luckykas posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 11:14am for And I'm Here to Please
Hurray and Hallelujah!!! JBERN'S BACK!!!! The eagerly awaited update is awesome!!
The Harry Snape talk is thought provoking. Snape is supposed to be analytical (though overtly cynical) and Harry raises quite a few valid points. I would have loved to see Snivellus's reaction to his house burning down. That would have been fun.
Hagrid and Hack continue to amuse. You manage to smuggle them into the story without slowing the pace of the narration. Looking forward to more of their shenanigans.
As to granger finding out about Harry's animagus form, was that really necessary? I mean you must have something planned for this later in the plot. Also can Harry call her Granger in private when they are alone and Hermione in front of others? That level of impersonal detachment will really break down "Miss. I am always right". After all Snape, Malfoy and everyone who dislikes her refers to her as Granger.
Confronting Ginny in RoR... your Harry managed to convey his anger and resentment without sounding like a whiny bitch. But I wouldn't mind him 'talking' to Neville about weaslette...pretty please....Neville is a good guy and deserves to know what a gold digging slut his current girl friend is.
Dumbledork is long overdue for some payback. This latest stunt with tranfiguring Harry into furniture really earns him some major pain...please deliver it to him. I don't think he would be bothered with Harry creating a Homunculus as he is a selfish guy who firmly believes in ends justifying the means as long as his hands stay clean.
Susan's outburst is totally uncalled for but Harry makes a good point. "Prove you are all worth saving". Cant help sympathizing with the girl though..
I enjoy your work a lot and hope you get time to be able to update your fan fics soon.
JBern replied:
Thanks for the long review. Glad you continue to enjoy my stories. Lie 13 is almost completed and I'll be back to this one soon. I think you'll be pleased.~Jim
Jizzle posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 11:05am for And I'm Here to Please
Man it's good to have another JBern story update, and what a good update it was.
I like Luna's take on the animagi/animagus running gag. It was good to see it come up again, and being a furnituremagus would be awesome. For at least five minutes. On a related note, man do I hate Dumbledore. Choke him to death with a rusty spoon. Please.
Hack and Hagrid's misadventures were terribly disturbing. Really, really disturbing. Still funny though, so it's all good.
Snape's a git. I loved seeing him unconscious and vomiting. It'll be even better if he's forced to do something really helpful for Harry. That'll be delightful. I get the feeling that life debts are going to be important. I hope Harry gets some research in on those, or maybe just ask Kwan? Life debts seem to be something a man of his skills and calling would have to know a bit about.
How did you make me hate Fawkes? Next to Hedwig, possibly the most lovable Harry Potter character there is, and I despise him here. Bravo.
I felt as dissatisfied as Harry with the Harry/Ginny confrontation, which is really how it should be. She was just a stupid little girl with a crush, and she made a mistake. There's no real satisfying outcome to that. I did like seeing Neville mentioned. I wonder what, if anything, you'll do with Neville in this story. Neville's just awesome, and your evil!Neville in Coming Darkness was excellent. I look forward to seeing what develops with him here.
And saving the best for last, I enjoyed your Luna this chapter. I can't imagine how tricky it is to handle a character with her kind of horribly warped social interaction issues in social situations that aren't just one on one with our man Harry. No matter what she says, she has way bigger problems dealing with people than Harry does. He's got anger and betrayal issues, yeah, but he does not have a second personality he hides behind. I think you pulled off Luna quite well this chapter, especially the discomfort at the "beach."
I loved the chapter and look forward to whatever you release next. I also look forward to reading your original fiction. Happy writing.
JBern replied:
Still trying to catch up on reviews. Glad you enjoyed it. Chapter 13 of Lie is now up. I'm pleased that you caught the little details in the chapter like Luna playing on Bungle's Animagus joke and so forth.
I do my best to make the story feel as real as possible to the readers and it shows that I am succeeding in reviews like yours.~Jim
Cuey posted a comment on Sunday 18th May 2008 9:48am for And I'm Here to Please
Great chapter Jim.
JBern replied:
Thanks. Way behind in review replies, but Lie 13 is now up.~Jim
warpwizard posted a comment on Monday 19th May 2008 12:39pm for And I'm Here to Please
JBern replied: