Wonderbee31 posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 10:46pm

All right, frst off, let me say, this just rocked as a whole. Harry/James is definitely making a mark, some good, some bad. I almost felt bad for Hermione at first, but, could understand where after a minute or so of her going on, Harry telling her to stuff it, and that she'd be hurt by that. It was also neat for his description of Tracey and Millicent as well, but too bad that he and Katie are on the outs, along with most of Gryffindor house.

I agree that the way most of the wizarding kids act, is like sheep, and here's hoping that with the way things happened at the end, what Harry might do, or will he be able to get out of the tourney, or will he want to? Anxiusly waiting for the next time.

JBern replied:

Thank you very much.   Glad you liked the details of the story.   The old adage of Everyone loves a winner comes to mind when I think about how the other students treat HJ.

Look for more of that next chapter.~Jim

nesparatu posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 9:59pm

Another good part. I liked the reactions because Harry was late for the date, although I wonder how his now worse reputation will translate into questioning how his name was in the cup. And I can't wait to see how he deals with the tasks given his level of skill and knowledge now.

JBern replied:

There will be a lot of questions and a more mature/competent HJ won't let Crouch Jr remain undiscovered for long.~Jim

helsmaid posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 9:40pm

new to the site. i like this strory.he is adult in a kids body he is not going to fit in to much.

JBern replied:

Thank you for the review.   I hope you continue to explore and find more stories that you enjoy.~Jim

Mickey posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 8:49pm

Your character seems incredibly mature for his age. James was what 21 when he died? And is dealing with 15-16 year old girls? While I'll grant that the girls would seem immature to him normally they wouldn't all seem like children unless he was an unusually mature 21 y/o.

The Unicorn

P.S
And no, the fact that he was in the midst of a war doesn't explain it.

JBern replied:

I disagree.   James wasn't just an average twenty something when he died.   He was married, had a child, was orphaned in his sixth year.   He was in the middle of a war, driven into hiding because his son was on the receiving end of a prophecy.   His wife cheated on him with one of his best friends.   He had defied Voldemort 3 times and his parents were killed for it.

He was trying to get nice nice with Penny who's 18-19 right now.   He'd probably go for some of the 17 yr olds, but he's 14 in their eyes and just barely that.   I'm a long way removed from my high school years, but I can recall older boys dating much younger girls, but not the other way around.

Toss in the fact that he's also the emotionally abused shut in Harry Potter and I think that I am characterizing HJ believably and realistically.   I respect your opinion, but I also respectfully disagree.~Jim

ankit_2415 posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 8:09pm

man this new chap is well written really good
im looking forward for the next chap impatiently

JBern replied:

Thanks.   As noted there will be a delay on the next chapter as I try and wrap up one story and launch another.~Jim

Mesterio posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 7:44pm

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

JBern replied:

Thanks, I guess.~Jim

Renzo7 posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 6:14pm

excellent work, as always. I really like the personality, the sarcasm, or is it cynisism? I'm not sure what the term is, but it makes for extremely fun reading. Keep up the awesome work, but please make it payback time soon, for all his supposed marauderness and ability, HJ's taking it like a wimp from everyone. I hope you update soon.

JBern replied:

He still intends to stick it out because he has better things to do, but a guy can only take so much...

Jim

Chris Williams posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 6:07pm

Solid entertainment as usual, good to hear about Turn Me Loose.

JBern replied:

Thanks.   Glad you enjoyed it.~Jim

wana10 posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:59pm

i'm gonna love seeing this harry's response to this situation. also, with the school already pissed at him and him not caring, the increased coldness should be interesting to see if he starts caring or just lets it slide off.

can't wait for the next chapter.
-wana10

JBern replied:

Or he could react very badly to the next little prank the Weasley play...Jim

CFeagle posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:42pm

The Weasleys are a bunch a bastards aren't they:P Good story, I liked the comment about time travel that doing it all over again is real boring. Ow and they're real mature... hanging Neville on a wall just because he went with Harry. It seems the entire castle needs to grow up:P

JBern replied:

Thanks for the reveiw and hte comment in the thread.   They actually hung Neville on the wall because he wouldn't tell them where he and HJ went.   It's an important distinction.~Jim

skulLXeon posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:41pm

alright. Here starts the mayhem as usual... lol... XD good chapter and its kinda cool to see Harry actually being the bigger man and not start lashing out at people messing with him, but then again, he feels he doesn't have time to do that, right? eh... its all good...
Good job as usual...
and see you around...
XD when you update this or TFCD or when you post Turn Me Loose.

adios for now.... but i have to say, Harry delivering a good drop kick to any of the Weasley's wouldn't be amiss, well any but Ginny cause then that'd just be cruel... lol...

JBern replied:

http://forum.fanficauthors.net/showthread.php?tid=1424

I discuss the twins in this thread, so I won't really repeat myself.   Look for chapter 1 of TML this weekend.~Jim

joeBob posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:36pm

Another great chapter, thanks!

Yeah, I suppose it would suck to be a (relatively) adult stuck in the middle of teenage idiocy. One would have hoped/expected that the Weasley twins were a little more mature and perceptive though.

You seem to have all the fourth year bases covered -- but why was Dumbledore unmasked at the DADA class? That didn't happen in canon and doesn't seem particularly needed here.
Dumbledore is still a complete idiot if he does not detect Crouch Jr or stop Harry from competing.

JBern replied:

Ah, you stumble on the hidden nugget.   DD came to the Unforgivable lecture specifically to observe HJ's reaction to them.   He's worried about the boy and how the exposure to Dark Magic had effected him.   Does that make sense when I put it like that?

http://forum.fanficauthors.net/showthread.php?tid=1424

I discuss the twins and the other students  in this thread.   It's easier to point you there then repeat myself.   Feel free to add to the discussion.~Jim

Kamishiro_Rin posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:29pm

DANG! I love this story.

You'd think that the Weasly twins had enough brains in them to realize that if they got injured for any reason, that their treatment might be delegated to the guy they're tormenting. "Opps, I accidentally gave you growing potion, when that should have been skelegro. My bad. Sorry, but the anti-growing potion will take at least a month to brew."

JBern replied:

Well there still is the Nurse after all.~Jim

CosmosGravitation posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:27pm

Loved every second of it. It seems with every chapter this story gets better and better.The characterization is especially noteworthy. I can definitely "feel" the characters.

Among all fan fics, this has become the story I look forward to reading the most. I like to think I read all the good one's too. I'm looking forward to the next chapter even more then I'm looking forward to the start of the sequel of Bungle. Trust me, I mean that as a huge compliment.

Keep up the good work.

JBern replied:

Thank you for the compliments.   Next chapter will be delayed because I'm trying to wrap Darkness, launch Turn Me Loose and keep my head above water.~Jim

busted posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:08pm

I love this story keep up the good work I cant wait till harry starts going out with fleura should be good :D

JBern replied:

Sparks will fly, but probably not in a good way just yet.~Jim

jeffstrauser@yahoo.com posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:04pm

Outstanding chapter!!!! I loved the chapter and I can't wait to read what happens in the next chapter. I'm glad I spent my lunch break reading this because it was worth every second of it. Will Harry be a Hogwarts Champion and on the All House Quidditch team too? Do keep up the outstanding work and update soon please:):):):)

JBern replied:

Nope, he'll be off the team and Cho will be the starter with Malfoy the reserve - unless something happens to our poor little Ravenclaw....

Glad you continue to enjoy the story.~Jim

Prince Charon posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 5:02pm

Ouch, poor Harry. Once again, screwed over by fate. Very interesting.

Thank you for updating.

More soon, please.

JBern replied:

Thanks for reviewing.   Hope you continue to enjoy.~Jim

MarinePotterfan posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 4:44pm

I wonder how everyone is going to feel when they find out what Harry did for Neville. Everyone is going to hate him now that his name came out of the goblet.

Thanks for writing
MPF

JBern replied:

Yeah, his rep isn't very good at the moment, so expect things to go poorly for him.   Plus there are other suprises coming...~Jim

Jim_xinu posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 4:12pm

Good chapter. I did, however, notice a mistaken word: "I can emphasize with it." emphasize -> empathize.

Showing Bartemius Crouch on the Map in DD's office while Moody's in 'his' office, and then around the castle later, is a seriously nice touch! It plugs a gaping JKR plot hole, IMO.

Reading the references to Sarah Underhill in the previous chapter and this one, I'm now guessing that she's someone Snape killed? As part of his DE initiation maybe?

While it's kinda sad that HJ's not getting along with his friends, it's kinda unavoidable. It doesn't really matter what they do, they're still going to be mostly annoying to him now. It's a shame about the twins, especially. In canon, I've always thought that they were some of Harry's most loyal supporters.

HJ's initial impressions of Fleur are surprising poor for the stated ship. It'll be really interesting to see their first interactions. :-)

Turn Me Loose coming this weekend? Awesome.

Thanks for sharing this with us.

JBern replied:

Moody is only visible when he is out of the trunk being interrogated by Barty.   Like Barty knows anything about teaching!   He wasn't visible when HJ saw Crouch with Dumbledore, but since HJ is only looking at the map when he is training, if he doesn't see Moody that's a good thing.

Don't expect Barty's deception to last much longer.  

http://forum.fanficauthors.net/showthread.php?tid=1424

I discuss the twins and other students (not Ron and Hermione though) in this thread on the forum.   It's easier for me to point you there for my perception of why people are acting the way they are.

Sparks will fly between HJ and Fleur and not in a good way.

There's more on Sarah Underhill coming in the next chapter.   You'll see then.~Jim

MarkH posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2007 3:45pm

You know, when I first read this chapter, I was questioning the seeming OOC nature of many of the characters. But then, I thought about it a bit more and realized that their behavior really isn't OOC at all. In fact, it may be a little too In-Character for my liking ...;-)

On the other hand, not everyone at school follows along with the gossip and/or crowd, which would mean that more people would be less hostile to Harry in your story.... Not necessarily Ron or Hermione, but certainly some of the other Lions etc...

Anyhow, loved the story.

Mark

JBern replied:

http://forum.fanficauthors.net/showthread.php?tid=1424

I posted there about Fred, George and the average Hogwart's students.   It's easier to point you there then continue to repeat myself.   Feel free to join in the discussion.   Glad the story continues to impress.~Jim