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MonkeyAxman1302 posted a comment on Thursday 26th July 2007 6:55am for Utter Chaos

Great chapter. Neville going all rampage on the Slytherins was kind of out there. Especially when he told Draco he wanted to see him bleed.
Its amazing how quickly ones plans can unravel. Still think it was a little cruel that you let Parkinslut live and Ginny die, definitely not a fan of hers are you!
I will review to you DH email seperately.

JBern replied:

Ah but didn't you like how Neville still had his twisted hero worship of Harry at the time.   He said I was worth ten of you!   I especially enjoyed writing Draco crawling along the ground in a leg locker (shades of book 1 where he did the same thing to Neville).

I guess I'm cruel to Ginny; I'm seeking help for it...   :-)


DrT posted a comment on Thursday 26th July 2007 3:34am for Utter Chaos

My, the Minister is a bit sneaker in your version (as he should have been). As usual, an interesting chapter. If Neville is gone (and unable to confess), then his 'uncle' will likely be in Harry's sights.


PS -- I didn't like DH much either. Better than HBP, but that ain't saying much in my view.

JBern replied:

Thanks.   Yes Coedus will probably be facing Harry's wrath in the near future.   Odd that Coedus really isn't guilty of that...

I liked DH better than HBP.   I joked that HBP was the literary equivalent of a 'dead cat bounce' in the financial markets.   DH had nowhere to go but up after HBP.   It simply didn't go high enough to make it anything other than an average read.~Jim

Princess Fictoria posted a comment on Thursday 26th July 2007 1:33am for Utter Chaos

Wow! I was wondering just what was going to happen now that Neville had gone way way too far for even a tiny shred of hope of getting away with it. Amazing just how stupid he was, though. All he had to do was stand and act like he was under the Imperious curse, or otherwise enchanted by the big bad and evil vampire. But now that he is dead he will still be remembered fondly as everyone will assume that he was under some sort of curse or as Harry called it, Brain washing.

At least his body won't be taken over by his supposedly loving uncle. I hope that Harry doesnt blame himself for this since he could have killed the vamp long ago.

Nice escape by the minister, though it was sad that he had to use an unforgiveable in order to escape. Wonder how voldie will feel when he learns he was bamboozled.

Havent read the book, and in no great hurry to do so since most of the people who have are rather dissapointed in it. AS usual, your story is great.

JBern replied:

Well Rufus has been going through bodyguards at an alarming rate.   It's getting harder to find people willing to take an AK for him.

If Nev had all the info available to the reader, he might have played 'dumb' and gotten away with it, but in his deluded mind he was - THE HERO!!! - and heroes go out in a blaze of glory.

Thank you for the compliments.   I hope that you continue to enjoy as I bring this to a conclusion.~Jim

Wonderbee31 posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 10:35pm for Utter Chaos

Man, when Nev melts down, he doesn't do things halfway. The most intense chapters yet, and considering Neville from canon, this one is out past Pluto, or was. I do hope that Coedus gets his, as well as Rufus, who is showing he's just as mean as Tom in his own way. Looking forward to the aftermath of this fight, as well as what this will mean for Hogwarts, and how things will go with the houses now, as I see whatever trust there might have been totally shot now.

JBern replied:

Glad you liked the intensity.   Many people deserve to 'get theirs', but like the real world some might elude justice.

The school will be a different place next chapter.~Jim

fraupapst posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 10:15pm for Utter Chaos

What a way to finish the Neville sub-plot (it is finished, isn't it?). Killed by the pain in the arse. Excellent. Shades of grey and people going bad in the fight on the 'good' side is one of the many things that were completely absent from Deathly Hallows.

JBern replied:

Thank you for the compliments.   You could definitely say that the Neville plot thread is 'dead'.   Next chapter in 2 weeks.~Jim

Edem posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 8:53pm for Utter Chaos

that was some chaos, I liked it =D
I really wonder how the rest of the school will react

JBern replied:

The school will be a much different place next chapter.   Gald you enjoyed it.~Jim

potterfrkintx posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 8:30pm for Utter Chaos

Holy shit!! That chapter was aptly named!! CHAOS indeed!!! haha Neville went off the deep end BIG TIME! * Haven't read book 7 yet, so I dunno which route you took, but anyways.... * See you in the funny papers!!

JBern replied:

That's what I was aiming for.   You'll see how my Neville differs from DH Neville when you read the book.~Jim

Blocker posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 8:19pm for Utter Chaos

Damn. That was intense

JBern replied:

Thank you for the compliment.~Jim

Machiavelli Jr posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 8:02pm for Utter Chaos

Amazing. Draco being a spineless little shit and managing to do something useful anyway. Wonders may never cease [/sarcasm]. Great job with Neville going completely off the deep end at last and Daphne looks interesting too. Nice chapter; whilst I don't agree with you about DH this makes for a nice change of pace and is immeasurably better than all the knee-jerk post-DH fics floating around.

JBern replied:

Well, I'm glad you enjoyed DH.   It didn't meet my expectations.   I am even more glad that you enjoy my story.   As you can see, the deep end is rather murky.   Next chapter in 2 weeks.~Jim

Rebel Goddess posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 7:16pm for Utter Chaos

I "Eeek!"ed repeatedly first at Pansy's fall, then the attack on the Ministry. You're really racking up the tension! Neville is so far off the deep end I think he's got benthic marine organisms growing in his hair.

Loved the Alice in Wonderland style escape plan and it was interesting to read about the lesser used Slytherins. Intriguing use of Draco in the end scenes, though I can't blame him for swearing when he realised who it was. As always, great chapter. More please.

PS - Out of interest, why did you dislike DH?

JBern replied:

Glad you enjoyed the chapter so thoroughly.   Next chapter coming in two weeks.   As for what I didn't like about DH, I don't have the space for it here, but it just didn't do it for me.   Here's a brief summary of why...

There were glaring plotholes and inconsistencies with her previous books.   Dues Ex Machina plot devices were introduced too late for my liking, and it became apparent that it was the wand that makes the wizard (insert penis metaphor here).   After not having a vision the entire book 6, Voldyvison returned with a new fall lineup and HP had the all access pass to view pretty much whenever it was necessary.   There was too much exposition as JKR felt it necessary to prove beyond a reasonable doubt the motivations of DD and SS that took away from the fact that this book should have been about HP.

I could go on, but it's not necessary.   Email me off line if you want further detail.   Back to this story.   The next chapter is in two weeks.   I'm hoping that 4 chapters will be enough to get me to the end without it feeling rushed.~Jim

joeBob posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 4:31pm for Utter Chaos


Shame Neville couldn't finish Draco.

Maybe Harry will come to his senses and say that "it was too late"? ;-)

JBern replied:

Thanks.   I had considered Nev and DM taking each other out, but I still need DM around...


stuart posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 3:40pm for Utter Chaos

nice, i knew nev couldnt last forever but it was nice while it lasted, looking forward to your next update. cheers

JBern replied:

Next chapter in 2 weeks.   Thanks.~Jim posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 2:55pm for Utter Chaos

Outstanding chapter!!!! Wow thats the way Neville should always die in a blaze of glory fighting. I however think Neville was so hell bent on revenge that it twisted him into something not worth knowing in the long run. I loved what Neville had Parkinslut do that was awesome. What will happen to Neville if he isn't really dead? Do keep up the outstanding work and update soon please:):):):)

JBern replied:

Thanks.   I think it was the little touches like Neville still hero worshipping Harry while killing the snakes that really drove home how far gone Neville was by that point.   Next chapter in 2 weeks.~Jim

LoggingInSucksAss posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 2:02pm for Utter Chaos

Fuck, Draco lives. Too bad - finally one I wouldn't miss.

But at least he knows what a big pain in the ass feels like now. :)

JBern replied:

You bet he does!   No guarntee he'll make it to the end, so you might still get your wish.~Jim

Decumo9 posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 2:00pm for Utter Chaos

very nicely done....i never really like neville much anyway

JBern replied:

Thank you for the compliment.   Next chapter in 2 weeks.   See you then.~Jim

Cuey posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 1:45pm for Utter Chaos

I knew Ginny wouldn't survive those curses and that fall. Another brutal chapter to fill the Daily Prophet's Obituary page.

I think the funniest part is that Neville had a chance of blaming it all on Coedus, but he went off on a rampage and got killed by a pen knife. Still, if it was up to me he'd be in line for an Order of Merlin 1st Class.

JBern replied:

Yeah, I have to update the obits in my ffa thread.   Neville was too far gone to realize that he could have pawned it off on the Vampire.   Glad you enjoyed it.   Next chapter in 2 weeks.~Jim

MarinePotterfan posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 1:19pm for Utter Chaos

WOW Neville went nuts! Boy the crap hit the fan everywhere.


JBern replied:

Indeed it did.   Hopefully, it was realistic enough for your tastes.   Next chapter in 2 short weeks.~Jim

Fishburne posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 12:38pm for Utter Chaos

Holy Crap!, He Killed Neville!


Loving it , Loving It! Once again JBern, your words do more than just destroy characters, they make us love their deaths!


JBern replied:

If it's going to be brutally violent, it should be done with a flair.   Hopefully, I'll continue to impress you through the conclusion of this story.   (I promise that my epilogue won't leave you scratching your head.)~Jim

PerfesserN posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 11:53am for Utter Chaos

Wow, it seems like the month of the Grim Reaper, of course I think your bodycount is a bit higher (and slightly more reptilian) than JKR's.
I like your characterizations of, well, <i>everybody</i>. Fatal flaws abound, and no plan survives the first engagement with the enemy!
Write on, write on!

JBern replied:

I don't know, she casually mentioned that there were about 50 dead towards the end, but I'd like to think that mine actually felt more realistic to you the readers.

Flawed characters are much more engaging than paragons of virtue.   I hope I continue to impress you through the conclusion of this story.   (More of your story soon I hope!)~Jim

Mark Blaine posted a comment on Wednesday 25th July 2007 11:46am for Utter Chaos

Neville, ah, murderous Neville. I'm finding it hard not to cheer Malfoy's executioner, and yet ...

JBern replied:

When I started this story, I looked at time travel stories where Harry is always angsting about how awful the war was.   So, I decided to really show the readers how awful the war should be without the luxury of escaping to the past.   When finished, I hope it will be called the Saving Private Ryan of HP fanfics.~Jim