renfro92w posted a comment on Tuesday 21st September 2010 7:55am

This was wonderful! You've really outdone yourself here. I had read To Fight The Coming Darkness which was excellent, but this takes the prize! Please continue with this AU when you have the time.

Riven posted a comment on Wednesday 25th August 2010 9:33pm

so, any news on the sequel to this story?

Gullwhacker2 posted a comment on Wednesday 25th August 2010 5:41pm

You know, this is late fridge logic on my part, but it just struck me that this Voldemort doesn't have the immunity to HJP's blood protection that the canon one does.

Should make those final clashes fun.

Children-of-Bodom posted a comment on Saturday 7th August 2010 6:36am

I just finished reading this one for the 2nd time and fell in love with it all over again.

The concept of Harry with his father's memories is unique to me and worked out perfectly, but the best feature of this story is your "Hat". I don't think I have ever laughed so hard while reading.

Simply genius! And I really hope that you write a sequel to this in the future, despite your endeavor in writing for money.

Greetz,

CoB

Teh_General_Lee posted a comment on Sunday 1st August 2010 7:58am

Easily the best HP fic ever. Can't wait for the sequel

Abraxan posted a comment on Saturday 31st July 2010 1:09pm

Wow, Jim, a very entertaining story! I really enjoyed it. The editor in me wants to point out that the term is "free rein" as in the kind of reins used on a horse. Giving the horse free rein means he's going at his own speed in his own direction and the rider is trusting him to it. "Reign" means the kind of ruling a monarch does, and it's never "free."

I liked your Harry/James/HJ concept. It's unique in my experience, and led to some interesting situations. I'm sorry poor Remus had to die, and I'm shocked Lily cheated on James, but that relationship with her explains why he seemed to revere her memory even more than James's in a way.

If you get odd reviews from me at times, I'm doing most of my fanfic reading on my phone and it isn't always easy to leave reviews with it. Hope your book sales are going well! My second Star Sons novel will be coming out in the next couple of months.

Keep up the good work!

Abraxan

Zicou posted a comment on Thursday 29th July 2010 10:40am

I just reread it, and it's still as awesome as ever!
When do you plan to write a sequel?
I can't wait :):
Z.

Zicou posted a comment on Thursday 29th July 2010 10:40am

I just reread i, and it's still as awesome as ever!
When do you plan to write a sequel?
I can't wait :):
Z.

Abraxan posted a comment on Wednesday 28th July 2010 11:15am

Wow! I LOVE the way you've developed James and shown us that he WAS prepared Tolt fight for his family. I always thought JKR did him a great disservice, making it sound like Lily was the only one prepared for the attack. I don't like the bit about her and Remus, but I'm sure you'll do something interesting with them

Abraxan

Abraxan posted a comment on Wednesday 28th July 2010 11:15am

Wow! I LOVE the way you've developed James and shown us that he WAS prepared Tolt fight for his family. I always thought JKR did him a great disservice, making it sound like Lily was the only one prepared for the attack. I don't like the bit about her and Remus, but I'm sure you'll do something interesting with them

Abraxan

zyvanume posted a comment on Wednesday 16th June 2010 9:06pm

your a great author, to say the least. you write such masterpieces. I am very interested to see how you would continue this story, but I know that you have real life to deal with, stories to sell and put food on the table with, and the other stories unfinished. but honestly, take your time. someone like you should know by know that you simply can't rush perfection. please, contact me if you wish to talk. I'm reachable at zyvanume911@yahoo.com

miahtech posted a comment on Wednesday 2nd June 2010 11:49am

Please please do make that sequel. This has instantly become one of my more favorite fics and I sincerely want more. :)

zArkham4269 posted a comment on Sunday 23rd May 2010 11:04am

Of all the fanfic I read, I think this chapter had to be the funniest. I love the by-play between H and Hr about the whole mounting and riding to victory!

The only problem I had was after the boggart, it felt wrong that HJ called her Granger and she responded with Potter instead of Harry.

cherrypit8 posted a comment on Tuesday 4th May 2010 5:14pm

I really really enjoyed this! I think your take on the Triwizard tournament, with the events and whatnot, made a lot more sense than how they were portrayed in the book. You had the Champions [u]prove[/u] that they were worthy of being chosen, so for that I thank you. I didn't particularly like your characterization of Fred and George, since in the books they are two of my favorite characters, but you did it realistically enough in relation to your story that it worked. I especially enjoyed HJ throughout...so witty! I was dying of laughter during several scenes and was thankful that no one else was around. :) I hope to see a sequel to this soon!

Mistress of Potions posted a comment on Friday 23rd April 2010 7:41pm

Quite an intense bit about Dumbledore. No wonder HJ is as nasty as he is later (I don't think I'd be even that nice). Are you really going to write a sequel? I hope so, although topping this will be difficult.

Zicou posted a comment on Tuesday 20th April 2010 2:12pm

Arrgh i reread it, and as awesome as ever :)
When will you begin a sequel ?
Z.

Daily Prophet Reporting posted a comment on Monday 19th April 2010 5:26am

Jim,

I just wanted to share my thanks for all your hard work on this. I've been around the fandom for a while and it's been a very long time since I've found myself this drawn in by a fic.

I think I'm most impressed with the way you use your characters. That starts with an extremely cleaver premise, of course, but by blending Harry's and James' personalities, you come up with a way to stay mostly true to canon characterizations for everyone else and apply just enough subtle pressure to produce a set of results all your own despite the familiar framework. Harry playing the press enough to impress even Rita? Harry and the twins being fierce rivals? For you, it definitely works.

I also greatly appreciate that all your characters have glaring flaws and weaknesses, and that you readily illustrate them. That provides a dose of reality I often find sorely missing in fic.

The end result, I think, is a very nice blend between the grandiose stories with larger-than-life -- almost fairytale-like -- characters often found on this site and the strictly canon-thumping stories one might find elsewhere. It's fun and fanciful without breaking too severely with JKR's world, and I'd say that's a very commendable achievement.

I'm also an avid sports fan, and I really like the way you've expanded the tournament to build the excitement. Your choices for events so far have been impeccable -- hinting at the competitors' strengths and weaknesses, building up rivalries and friendships, and even providing some insight into wizarding culture (I love that every event is sponsored). Of course, the success of all of that is down to your ability to convey the action compellingly and believably. And I, for one, have really enjoyed it to this point.

And, of course, I would be remiss if I didn't say something about the Sort Hat. That's got to be one of the most unique characters I've seen in a fic -- but also as funny as any. Well done!

So anyway, thanks again for all the hard work. I look forward to seeing where the rest of this goes!

-KC

MonkeyAxman1302 posted a comment on Wednesday 24th February 2010 2:57pm

That was great Jbern! Sorry its been so long since I have reviewed or read your work. I haven't been reading fanfiction for quite a while. Life gets in the way and all that.

I liked your Epilogue and I especially liked Harry's eulogy for Dumbles. It was very good and quite powerful. Have you considered a career as a political speech writer? ;-)

A very good and clever story, I can't wait for you to write a sequel to this. I'll try to catch up some more over the next few days.

Thanks for writing, as ever.
Monkey

Bob Swagger posted a comment on Thursday 18th February 2010 4:35pm

I read your fictions over and over again and they NEVER get old. Thank you for writing.

Argonith posted a comment on Saturday 16th January 2010 3:44pm

I just finished reading, after three long nights, and good saturday lie-in, and a few subpar days at work; which, in other words, means I enjoyed your story immensely and made huge sacrifices to finish reading it quickly.

Things I liked:
-characterization. Your character's 'internal consistency' as I term it was excellent. Your characters actions/reactions were almost always consistent with what the readers would expect them to be, given what the reader knows about them at any given point
-original characters: the hat! Vulgarly exquisite. Aimee - loyal friend and a strong person, but her age shows through well.
-plot: plenty of imagination and twists
-romance: you hit all three criteria I think - believability, a tender openness, while also not overwhelming the story itself

Small Points of Improvmeent:
-Length: Definitely on the longer side, but that often happens in fan fiction, where the 'micro' of each chapter is well-edited, but the 'macro' view doesn't often get changed. The author formulates a storyboard at the beginning and executes it through every detail faithfully, leading to overly long stories.
-Small character inconsistencies: I personally felt HJ, especially J (as he was the one betrayed), would be more intent on tracking Pettigrew down. Especially after Dumbledore learns of the HJ part, and especially after the conversation in the Durmstrang boat where Pettigrew is mentioned. I understand it was a foreshadowing technique, but I don't think it was needed and it didn't add to the story.
-Lack of Harry in HJ: this is just a personal thing, but I felt the James personality dominated the new creation
-Too many side storylines: The focus on quidditch early on with Puddlemere doesn't seem to add much to the story, especially since afterward HJ isn't even all that interested in the sport (passing up on watching both Hogwarts all-team games); Luna's interview (so far) is a dead end; characters appearing and disappearing - Katie & the older quidditch housemates factors a big way earlier on, then essentially disappears. I understand that you're writing faithfully what HJ's year likely would have been like, with certain people becoming more or less important as the year goes on, but it added a lot of extra verbiage/unnecessary character development without commensurate plot advancement.

Now, I must apologize. I tend to become verbose when I begin giving critiques, as most people I know typically value that more than the praise. Nevertheless, I want to say that out of the hundreds of stories I've read in fan fiction, this is definitely up there in the top 10, and I thank you profusely for the amount of entertainment I've derived from your free work. I will certainly consider looking into your original work Jim.