By JBern
Reviews
MonkeyAxman1302 posted a comment on Tuesday 3rd February 2009 9:40am
I like that Bill was helping the twins get through Harry's wards to get him. These are traditional Weasleys who stick together against Harry. Its odd to switch between this and the TML world where Bill is on his side.
Like the duel with Athena that is really good, as usual you skill at depicting action scenes is exemplary. I also like his comment; "People want their legend; I'll give them their bloody legend!".
Liked the use of the house mascots in his duel with Krum.
Thanks for writing.
Monkey
JBern replied:
Thanks.~Jim
Ezra'eil posted a comment on Monday 2nd February 2009 1:44pm
For some reason I keep picturing Harry making some type of giant snake through complicated enchanting in the next task, must be the wrong story...
JBern replied:
No plans for a giant sea snake - at least not in this story...
Jim
Ezra'eil posted a comment on Monday 2nd February 2009 11:43am
Kwan Chang-Ho and Jacob Collins... Gee... I wonder where I have seen these two before :P
JBern replied:
Well, Aimee Beaucourt has appeared in all 3 of my fanfic series (she was a Death Eater in TFtCD and "Nicolette" in TML). I was trying to come up with a Hitwizard to make the attempt on Manos and halfway through coming up with this female Spanish witch, I was like, "Hey, I've already got a perfectly good pair of Hitwizards in another story!"
silverleafhp posted a comment on Monday 2nd February 2009 7:45am
I knew, just knew you would take a cop out, and make everything "ok" with Harry and Remus, I just knew it from the first chapter that mentioned that he and lily cheated.
It is odd, but I expected a little more from you. Every fic I have ever read that involves any kind of disagreement between Harry/Remus is resolved with Harry forgiving him no matter what Remus did to cause the rift.
I see now that you are really no different. And here is a point that you may want to remember. The fact that James was away a lot fighting death eaters, in no way makes it alright for the wife to cheat. You basically just told the world that you support wife's or husbands of GI's in Iraq to have a little diddle with someone while their significant other is away serving their country.
That of course might not have been your intent, but that is basically what it boils down too. Shame on you Jbern, I expected better.
JBern replied:
Well I'm not certain that being HJ's punching bag constitutes being "okay" between the two of them. What would you rather HJ do? Alienate one of the few allies he has for something that happened over a decade ago? Beating the snot out of him on a routine basis, even with magic's ability to heal still has to hurt. Since, he doesn't know the context of their duels, I was sure to put Sirius Black's reaction that HJ was overdoing it.
HJ continues to struggle to identify who he is. He knows that he is neither Harry nor James and is beginning to understand the flaws in thinking and doing exactly what one of them would do. He doesn't want to be a clone of either one of them and seeks to define himself as his own man.
As for the "real life" comparison, being a US Navy veteran of the first gulf war and seeing firsthand the results of numerous incidents of wives diddling around on my shipmates, I'm not certain that you want to go down that road with me. I've walked this earth for nearly 40 years and have a wealth of life experience to back up my insights.
Your comparison also fails in that Remus and Lily were also fighting (though Lily not so much, since she was now obsessed with protecting her child) those same Death Eaters. The Potter household was part of the warzone instead of thousands of miles away from it. All of them were under intense pressure and often people under pressure make horrible mistakes.
Had the confrontation occured in the early chapters where James Potter's personality was more dominant, there likely would have been more violence, but HJ has had a chance to "grow up" some in the interim.
I created the affair as a plot device. In canon, I saw no reason why Remus Lupin would suddenly appear in Harry's life. The typical "Dumbledore asked me to stay away" answer doesn't really fly with me, so I looked for a realistic reason one that involves Lupin's own personal shame - his own feelings (like Black's) that he played a part in what happened. The whole "he's a dark creature and we can't make him our Secretkeeper" doesn't really sit well with me either.
I also don't really recall writing a strained relationship with Remus in To Fight the Coming Darkness except perhaps at the will reading in chapter 8 or 9 where Harry was understandably upset with all the authority figures in his life.
Finally, I don't see where HJ ever told Lupin that he thinks what happened was "okay" by any standards. He told him that they'd start over, since he isn't Harry and he isn't James and Lupin has the opportunity to earn his trust again. HJ considers Remus a weak man full of self loathing and knows that Lily wasn't exactly a passive participant in it either. Finally, I know enough of those "real life" guys to know that many of them wonder what they could have done different and see the infidelity as something "they" did wrong.
You may have expected better, but I'm not writing just to meet your expectations. This is my story and I will tell it my way.
Ezra'eil posted a comment on Sunday 1st February 2009 6:02am
You know... As you said, I'd be suspicious... I was always partial to the Malfoy's ordering Dobby to pretend to be free to get the skinny on Harry and his activities... An un-noticeable spy as such...
JBern replied:
That is an interesting theory. It'd make a good short fic, but I can't see Lucius allowing himself to be manhandled intentionally by a house elf.
jerry3 posted a comment on Saturday 24th January 2009 9:36am
truthfully i thought To Fight the Coming Darkness was your only good story this story proved me wrong so now im going to read bungle in the jungle well done sorting hat was hilarious
JBern replied:
Thanks. I hope you enjoy Bungle as well. Darkness was my "rookie" effort. I like it, but I look back and see so many ways I could have done it differently.~Jim
Lathena posted a comment on Tuesday 20th January 2009 9:55am
That is a tough decision, ouch. I always greatly enjoy your character development. I like the idea behind HJ, it's very original and a much better way to have harry mature and gain knowledge than the insta-super harry versions so common. So does he end up with Voldie's memories at some point? Also cool is how HJ is a different person from HP and JP, probably a better one than either, at minimum more entertaining. You do a good job of combining the two.
This story is hysterical. Well obviously not everything-which makes it more real. But after the bit where Neville asks what a dildo is (completely plausible) I wasn't quite rolling on the floor laughing only because my bed is at convenient throwing myself out of the chair distance. The hat is brilliant and utterly, sidesplitingly funny.
Also loved your portrayal of fleur. I can't wait to see where that is going. It's so very plausible.
The only problem with your stories is the quantity or lack of it and the fact that looking at other authors stories after yours seem flat and boring, with weak or completely unrelatable characters.
Good luck with your original works and I hope you don't forget about your little fanfics.
Oh and I caught the Kwan and Collins crossover from bungle in the jungle. Will Harry ever meet up with Kwan? He is in the market for mercs.
JBern replied:
Thank you for the compliments. I'm sorry if I'm spoiling you for others. :-)
peruvianprincess posted a comment on Sunday 18th January 2009 5:05am
The sorting hat was a bit of fun, but a little over-the-top with the profanities. It was like giving the hat a totally different character, and the whole reason behind it was so vague it left me with a 'what? no, wait...why???' kind of feeling. I still want to see where you're going with this. It's interesting.
JBern replied:
The Hat is over the top and hopefully you continued on with the story and enjoyed it.~Jim
Meghan posted a comment on Monday 12th January 2009 5:51pm
Great update - I wish it were longer and I know how annoying that is since I receive that all the time... but this story is simply superb. You're doing a tremendous job with this plot and I am eagerly awaiting your next move or HJ's. :)
JBern replied:
Thanks. I'm starting on this chapter after I finish responding to reviews. Hope all is well with you.~Jim
Minerva Granger posted a comment on Tuesday 6th January 2009 12:58pm
So, who? Frank, Alice or Lockhart? Actually, not Lockhart, he's too fa4 up himself. But I liked this chapter.
JBern replied:
Honestly, I'll probably keep the readers in the dark for the next few chapters - trust me HJ will be rather busy.~Jim
Crys posted a comment on Sunday 4th January 2009 10:00am
> He'd likely be trying to figure out how he could shag Fleur and still keep an eye on Aimee.
> Mirrors, I could probably do it with a conjured mirror or two. They'd have to be placed right and she'd have to be on top…
*laugh* There's the HJ we've all come to know and love!
> "Professor McGonagall changed the passphrase - Heroism is not measured in points, but deeds."
*eyeroll* Very subtle, McG. Or AD, depending.
Huh. Final dose of Elixir . . . All sorts of ways that can be useful.
Generous idea to use it on the Longbottoms, but it will definitely be more useful as a battlefield emergency medicine while fighting Voldy. Or at least a quick "cure-all" to get him back in fighting shape afterwards.
> but I choose to believe that immortality distorted his view of life.
Thereby conveniently bypassing the possibility that it's your own damn fault because you're asking the old man annoying questions.
Huh. He did give it to one of them. Interesting idea, but objectively, I think it's the wrong choice. Not that I really have a vote . . .
Anyway, I predict it'll be Frank. Yes, the two are about even as far as "good to Neville", so to speak. Therefore, we need to go to other reasons. Like it or not, Sirius is right. A good Auror is an invaluable asset. Not to mention he has some strategic intelligence (fighting styles of the Inner Circle DE's). And he can help HJ train.
JBern replied:
Glad you liked it. The readers have the benefit of knowing that the war will be coming very soon (given that the author is fairly impatient). HJ doesn't. He has something that might be able to save one of two good people, so he does some soul searching and roles the dice.
WorldOfLilyEvans posted a comment on Sunday 4th January 2009 12:40am
Happy New Year to you too!
You were indeed very generous towards your betas.
I loved reading this chapter! Looking forward to your next update!
-xxx- Malou
JBern replied:
Thanks for the review. More coming soon.~Jim
Ltank687 posted a comment on Saturday 3rd January 2009 9:19am
i couldn't believe you updated so quick! thank you so much, this was probably my favorite chapter out of this entire story. And for my two cents, Frank! Frank the Tank!
Looking forward, as always, to reading your story.
JBern replied:
Thanks. I'm glad you enjoyed it. It might be a few chapters before we see who HJ chose. More is on the way.~Jim
Rexnos posted a comment on Friday 2nd January 2009 6:47pm
That's a really lame cliff hanger there... I'd assume that Harry will rez Frank, but you might have just wrote it to read that way. It's been done before after all.
Anyway, the story is still running great. To be honest, I look forward to this story a little more than I do TML. TML is amazing and all, but I think the limited romantic tension holds it back in my eyes. That's totally my opinion though.
In any case, looking forward to the next chapter in both. Things just build up more and more... Just from the darker tone, Voldemort seems like much more of a beast than Rowling's ever did. I can't help but worry about our poor Harries...
Later,
Rex
JBern replied:
I thought it was a good cliffhanger. You can have drama without action. Anyway, more is on the way as soon as I clear the decks of the reviews.~Jim
MOD posted a comment on Friday 2nd January 2009 11:44am
Great chapter, as always!
JBern replied:
Thanks. More on the way soon.~Jim
Anthony May posted a comment on Friday 2nd January 2009 10:20am
JBern is a writing god!!!!!
JBern replied:
Thank you for the compliment.~Jim
ernichol posted a comment on Friday 2nd January 2009 9:04am
wicked awesome as always
JBern replied:
I appreciate the compliment.~Jim
DrT posted a comment on Friday 2nd January 2009 7:48am
Wow, HJ is really maturing emotionally. Good explanation on the oddness of Remus in canon, btw. A very solid and enjoyable chapter.
I admit, I can't see any reason to wake up Alice, but we'll see when you have a chance to enlighten us
JBern replied:
Of course if you look at a review I just received today (2/2/09), someone didn't like my HJ and Remus interaction. Oh well, you can't please them all.~Jim
Rebel Goddess posted a comment on Friday 2nd January 2009 5:27am
It's really interesting to see a more mature Harry emerging from this and also reacting against being too much like his father. Then again he's seen where that leads.
Laughed my head off at mermaid's pubic hair and why Harry would know mermish. Very funny. Also good to see Ron being less of a prat than his brothers for once. Harry's conversation with Remus was another interesting character study but it was his with Aimee that gave me my second firt of giggles. Loved the revelation to her about being an animagus.
Best of all was the ambiguity of the final part. How Harry can choose I don't know but it's a very difficult decision. I'm plumping for Frank, but I've no idea which way you'll jump with this one. Great story. Can't wait for the next chapter and yes, that cliffhanger was EVIL!
JBern replied:
Thanks. What happened to Monkey? I feel so abandoned!!! Glad you enjoyed the chapter so throughly. More coming soon after I answer all these reviews.~Jim
MonkeyAxman1302 posted a comment on Tuesday 10th February 2009 12:33am
JBern replied: