By JBern
Reviews
Kaerion posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 6:35am
Oh yeah, you're definitely keeping me interested with a chapter like this! It does have the feeling of a transitional chapter, but even when the action is all (or at least mostly) verbal, you manage to keep it interesting, entertaining, and engaging. I'm especially glad to see that you continue to keep away from the way too common mistake in "re-write" fics, namely sticking too close to canon. That, and your still excellent writing, are the two biggest reasons for me not being able to decide whether I'm looking more forward to the next chapter of TML, or this story.
And yeah, your Rita Skeeter-voice is just as repugnant, sleezy and canon-authentic as I've gotten used to! ;)
Keep up the great work!!
-Kaerion
JBern replied:
Thanks for the long review. I appreciete it. On it's own, the TWT isn't really that interesting. I decided to spice it up a bit. Next up is TML chapter 4.~Jim
gadriam posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 6:34am
Ooh, he's a right bastard, but a likeable one at least. HJ is probably the least sympathetic Harry I've ever read, but he's just hilarious. The censuring was a bit too abrupt for my taste, and Harry's mile wide stubborn streak surely made it worse in the most amusing way. the interactions with Rita and the other champs felt genuine, and I'm looking forward to the resolution of the stated ship. Unless there's a potion involved, strawberry flavoured perhaps, i can't see it happening.
Thank you.
g
JBern replied:
Finally catching up on my reviews. I figure there should be a way for a house to at least symbolicly disassociate themselves from a "troublemaker." HJ and Fleur definitely won't happen overnight.~Jim
Wolfric posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 6:31am
I enjoyed the chapter. The drama is well presented. Why do I think HJ is going to get some more dueling practice before his tournement tasks? I think having the hat for an advisor should provide plenty of opertunities for more fun. I am looking forward to it. Thanks for writing. W.
JBern replied:
You might be on to something there. I too suspect HJ will be getting some kind of dueling practice in. Next chapter before Xmas.~Jim
PerfesserN posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 6:29am
Talk about synchronicity. I started re-reading this fic yesterday, just to get a fresh perspective of the vitriolic hat (very well done BTW). Lo and behold, a new update today.
Spooky.
In a good way.
Leaving Rita with the hat was brilliant. I'd love to have been the fly on the wall for that conversation.
Nice way to begin a relationship, referring to the girl as a tart.
The again, I like tarts. . .
They'll find each other in the end, but they'll have to work at it. They'll have to build their relationship from the basement up.
Maybe that's why it's called "making love?"
Looking forward to the next update, of whatever you’re working on.
Write on.
N!
JBern replied:
Glad you enjoyed the chapter. Well he did think she was hot in a vapid beauty pagent way. I want them to have a few bumps along the way.~Jim
Quizer posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 6:20am
Another very enjoyable chapter. I see nothing wrong with your portrayal of Rita Skeeter, you seem to capture her quite well. But I don't quite like the effects her story will have on Harry's reputation. Likewise, Moody requesting the Marauder's Map does not bode well. With him actually pointing Harry's attention to it, it's a given that Fake!Moody's presence does not register on the map anymore... wait, do we even have Fake!Moody in this story? Because I can't really imagine he'd take the gamble of pointing Harry's interest at the map while there's still a possibility that he shows on it with his false name... Any statement you care to make on this?
Somehow Harry seems to attract a whole lot of adversity in all of your stories. Do you think this is one of his character traits, or is it just the typical stupidity of the English wizarding world? Because I notice that Harry does have quite a few friends and casual acquaintances in Bungle who don't turn on him on a moment's notice.
I liked how Harry got the Hat onboard as advisor. That should prove interesting and gives him an excuse to have the thing with him whenever he wants. I loved the 'Hat, tell her a joke' line.
I'm looking forward to the next chapter, and how you plan on building a rapport between Harry and Fleur, with them being off to such a bad start.
until next time,
Quizer
JBern replied:
I do like writing as Rita. You'll see what I have in store for Moody next chapter. Without adversity, there would be no fanfiction. Anyway, more of that adversity coming up next chapter. At least in the last 2 chapters no one was actively trying to kill him!
As for our French Tart, I like a relationship born in hostility. Hopefully, I can give a depth of character to Fleur's character that is rarely seen. Thanks as always for the lengthy review. No further comments at this time.~Jim
Darak1 posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 5:11am
My favourite Rita Skeeter story is still the one in which she gets crushed in her beetle form when Harry happens to take a walk on the terras during the ball. I'm willing to bet this Rita will suffer the same form of fate.
JBern replied:
It sounds like a waste when she could have been writing all kinds of juicy gossip.~Jim
ahsun92 posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 5:04am
Hmmmmm. Is Crouch discovered early?
Will Harry blow apart Krum's legs?
Good that you're not making Them Best Of Buddies In The Entire World like in other fics.
Does Harry just kill evryone in Gryffindor?
That would be an excellent plot twist!!
#Love# the regular updates!
Keep up the work, I admire your ability to carry on a Hiated Fic: most authors just give up.
JBern replied:
No, I just had to struggle to finish Darkness. It was the one in danger of being abandoned I'm glad to be finished with it and on to new things.~Jim
warpwizard posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:52am
Really good chapter, and I haven't really been a fan of this fic. This chapter seemed to have a lot more forward drive than the others. The way you write Rita is fun.
I want to praise you more, but your writing is good enough that my mind says, "He must know it's good, so it feels silly to tell him." But I know it's nice to hear, so I'll just say, you write at the level of good original novelistic fiction.
Just in case you were in doubt. ;)
JBern replied:
Thanks for telling me anyway. Next up is TML chapter 4, but I'll have another chapter of this one out before Xmas. Hopefully, my original works will be as well received as my fanfiction.~Jim
Crys posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:48am
Ooh, nasty history with Sarah Underhill, Snape, and Sirius you created there.
Good touch with the French. In two places.
> "Humor me."
> "Okay. Hat, tell her a joke."
> "There was a witch who walked into a bar…"
*hysterical laughter*
Liked that press conference. And Rita's article. For some reason, that quote from Victor is tugging at me.
Hmm. Moody. I can't remember if this is one where Moody really is himself or Crouch Jr (or someone else for that matter). *blink* *snicker* Ooh, I just had an evil premonition. We'll see if that one comes true. Let's just hope Harry looks at the map before bringing it to Moody (if it'll help ;).
Looking forward to when the entire thing blows up in Gryffindor's (and Fleur's) faces. The duels will be great fun if HJ actually tries instead of Harry-only.
Looking forward to the next thing you write.
JBern replied:
Thanks for the review as usual. I look forward to writing the nex chapter and getting the tasks started. Hopefully, I can write an exciting enough broom race.~Jim
Meteoricshipyards posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:46am
Wonderful. Glad to see a new update.
Ten events? That's different. Looking forward to seeing what you're going to do to Harry.
Shame about him being without peer support except Hermione. Are the 'Puffs going to come rescue him from loneliness? Although it sounds like Hermione will probably be his date.
The Hat is in fine form. Loved the interaction between it and Skeeter.
Moody -- now that Harry's suspicions are aroused, will he see Crouch Jr. on the map and get Moody early? It will still mean that he has to compete.
Great story. Thanks for writing it.
Tom A.
JBern replied:
On its own the TWT wasn't that interesting. Two out of three events weren't even viewable. I think the puff harem is the last thing on HJ's mind right now. Next up is TML 4, but another chapter of this one will be out before Xmas.~Jim
magus213 posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:37am
Brilliant. More of this!
JBern replied:
More coming soon~Jim
mathiasgranger posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:21am
A good dip back into the pool with this chapter. Gryffindor house should change their mascot from the lion to the sheep. Those Weasleys, save Arthur, are a pretty sad sack lot, aren't they?
Apparently being narrow minded and idiotic is a dominant hereditary trait for purebloods.
Thanks for writing,
Matt
JBern replied:
Thanks for the compliments. I just can't bring myself to write a story where every Weasley is a likeable character. Anyway, next chapter out before Xmas.~Jim
Alex00 posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:13am
Great work keep em coming.
JBern replied:
Thanks. Next chapter before Xmas.~Jim
Lee Steele posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:11am
Hi, I am really enjoying your story, it is so different, can't wait to see what direction you take it next. lee
JBern replied:
I think East is a nice direction. Sorry, I'm tired and catching up on all these reviews. Glad you enjoyed the chapter. Next one coming before Xmas.~Jim
skulLXeon posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:11am
Nice chapter as always. Hm... seems like Angelina really screwed up, hm... good job as always. See you around....
AGX[TAIL]
JBern replied:
Well hopefully, a spiteful Angie is something you haven't seen before. Next chapter due out before Xmas.~Jim
ruby tripton posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:10am
brilliant - as always.
JBern replied:
Thanks - as always. :-P
uthamm posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 4:01am
Nice job. I love the savvy HP/JP hybrid that you have here - somehow I picture this Harry as what he would have been having grown up with his Dad. Pretty cool.
Nice job on the Rita thing and I like the isolation that you have created with the censure. Full Marks!
JBern replied:
Glad you enjoyed it. I'm almost caught up on my reviews! Now HJ is growing up as his dad! Creepy huh? Next chapter due out by Xmas. TML chapter 4 is up next.~Jim
MrRobertsIII posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 3:40am
love that hat.
I like your twist on the tournament, especially the duelling.
The idea of a formal censure was excellent.
Cannot get the image of Flitwick and Madame Max out of my head.
JBern replied:
I bet it's a creepy image of the too! Glad you enjoyed the chapter. As always, I hope to continue impressing you readers with my keystrokes.~Jim
Miles Hance posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 2:42am
Snape....has been a bad boy. Playing around with polyjuice? I hope he gets his just desserts, just like in To Fight the Coming Darkness. Death, or at least serious maiming would go over well with me.
As far as Fleur goes, a volatile relationship leading into something romantic? Works for me. Harry Potter, bringing Fleur Delacour, the prima donna back to the real world? That could be the basis for the romantic side of this.
Just...update more often. Please! Turn Me Loose and this one are the best. Originals are all good and fine, but you do this very well.
Too well....I'm suspicious...
JBern replied:
As much as I enjoy doing this, I do want to see my own name up in lights. Hence the reason I write original stuff. I'm about 35000 words into an original novel that I hope to have published before next summer. Hopefully, you'll read it one day and say why did you waste time writing fanfics.~Jim
Roger posted a comment on Wednesday 28th November 2007 6:40am
JBern replied: